Betrayal

This post is going to be a lot different than almost all my other posts and a lot longer.

 

 While this is a fashion blog, it’s also a blog about my Second Life (SL). So, if you would rather stick to just the fashion side of just skip right over this post, because it’s going to get emotional.

 

Man, over the last few years my SL family has been put through the ringer but through it all we have come out of the darkness stronger and closer than ever. You see, my SL mom and I have a problem- our hearts are too big, and we always try to give people the benefit of a doubt, and this is where it bites us in the butt. We have a habit of giving people multiple chances- even after they hurt us.

 

Let me give you a bit of backstory to my health over the last year and longer. because this comes into play with both of my ex “sisters” accused me of lying about things involved in the following.

 

I suffer from a few health issues; epilepsy, fibromyalgia, chronic migraines, chronic fatigue, and insomnia, not to mention the condition I had been suffering with for the last year and a half that has now been alleviated but has led to a whole new problem- severe anemia. I don’t use these health issues as excuses. I simply tell family/friends what is going on and leave it at that, I don’t want pity or to have tons of questions asked. When I’m feeling pain, tired or bad in general I will just stay offline, to not bring everyone around me down.

 

Last June, I was married in real life to the man I met in SL back in 2018. It was during my wedding day, you know the day that is supposed to be the happiest day of your life, that my health almost ruined it. I’m about to get personal, turn away if you are squeamish. I’ve always suffered from heavy female monthlies, but nothing, I mean nothing prepared me for that day. I made it through hair and makeup fine. Felt perfectly normal and “shark week” was completely controlled. I got to the venue, changed into my dress and was waiting patiently with my arm looped through my dad’s to start the walk to my forever-only that didn’t happen right away. If you’re a female, you know about the “gush” when you are standing there, and you just know that you leaked. I informed my RL sister and best friend that I needed to go change my feminine product and they walked me to the bathroom. It was bad, it looked like a murder scene, they held up my dress and handed me things to clean off with, but it was like a river, it wouldn’t stop. Finally, we got it stopped for the time being so I could get down the aisle, but then they lowed my dress back to the floor and it had blood all over it. My RL sister jumped into action with clear soda and white napkins and got it off. After that crisis was averted and an hour and a half later, I walked down the aisle to the love of my life.

 

In the months that followed Shark Week continued to be horrible, sometimes lasting multiple weeks. However, in August, I was bleeding so heavily and passing clots that I fainted, thank goodness I was on my bed. My daughter convinced me to go to the emergency room and I was admitted due to my extremely low hemoglobin level and given blood transfusions over the next few days.  While I was there, they informed me that I had a uterine polyp measuring 7.6 x 5.2 x 6.0 cm and told me to schedule an appointment with my gynecologist to take the next steps to remove it. Using the ultrasound that was taken in the emergency room my gyno scheduled me for surgery in October. The day of surgery I was put under, and the procedure started, only upon getting into my uterus my doctor realized quickly that it wasn’t a polyp, but a rather large uterine fibroid tumor. Unfortunately, this meant my current procedure was over, after obtaining a biopsy of the fibroid and cleaning around it best he could, there was nothing else he could do, not knowing how far the fibroid was embedded in my uterus or other organs.

 

When I went in for my post op appointment, he apologized for not being able to do anything more for me during the procedure. It wasn’t his fault we both went in thinking it was a polyp. He sent me off with a referral for another ultrasound, both normal and transvaginal. When I got the results, the fibroid had gotten bigger, 11.6 x 8 x 8.9 cm, and my doctor then told me he was referring me to a doctor who specializes in robot-assisted hysterectomy. Unfortunately, due to me being on government insurance and her busy schedule she couldn’t see me until December. When I was finally able to see her, she did an exam and said let’s get you scheduled for your presurgical testing and then get the surgery scheduled.

 

Seems like everything is moving along well, right? Wrong. When I went in for my presurgical testing they found and inversion in my T-wave during the EKG so they wanted me to get cardiac clearance before surgery can be signed off on, then my doctor said that due to my surgery in October and the surgery they wanted me to have in January were so close together, they needed me to be cleared by my neurologist as well.

 

So, in January I saw my cardiologist who does another EKG, and he finds the same abnormality, in which I had come to find out that both my mother and grandmother had. So, he tells me I need an Echocardiogram and a nuclear stress test. So, the echocardiogram was scheduled for the following week, but they couldn’t get me in for the stress test until mid-February. In the meantime, I go to my Neurologist who sends me for an EEG and clears me for surgery. Finally, I get my stress test and a week later I receive the results and am cleared for surgery.

 

It’s the beginning of March, I should have the surgery soon then right? Nope! After I received all the clearances I needed, I sent the paperwork to my gynecologist’s assistant who informed me that there are no surgeries available until JUNE!  At this point in time, I’m starting to feel defeated. I’m bleeding almost constantly due to the fibroid.

 

So, I decided to message my doctor on My Chart. I inform her that I know the fibroid has gotten bigger and it’s causing me all kinds of issues like bleeding, pain, and incontinence because it’s flattening my bladder. She schedules me to come in the next day. After she does a pelvic exam, we tentatively schedule my robotic hysterectomy for April 29^th.  However, she needs another ultrasound that she wanted done at a certain location so that she gets the results as soon as they become available. I get the ultrasound and I get the results that the fibroid is now 15.4 x 11 x 10.4 cm.  My wonderful surgeon calls me the date the results come in and informs me that with the size of the fibroid that robotic surgery is off the table, and she would like to move my surgery up to April 19^th. Yay!

 

I’ve had two “sisters” do myself and my family horribly wrong, leaving a path of broken hearts and destruction in their wake.

 

Now let me preface this by saying the first sister I’m talking about joined my current family with me, she was already my sister when I joined the Runes in 2019. I can completely blame myself for this sister, even before joining the Runes she and I had fallen out multiple times, not to mention the destruction she caused in other people’s lives when she decided to cut them from hers. She is brutal when she is done with you, she will run your name through the mud and do everything in her power to make those around you feel differently about you. There are people who stick with her who are snowed by her “I’m being the bigger person” and victim mentality. She is a complete narcissist, user, and liar, who uses her RL handicap to take advantage of people. She has even went as far as sending people a picture of her “cut wrist” saying she tried to kill herself. The picture was proven to be fake and found on DeviantArt through a Google Image search. She told other people that my seizures were fake, and I was lying about that.

 

Back in November I was told by my SL mom after realizing this sister unfriended me that this sister wanted nothing to do with me anymore. So, I reached out to the sister to try to find out what happened because the last I spoke with her we were ok. Turns out she was mad at me because I wasn’t there for her for the anniversary of her SL brother’s death anniversary and Halloween because that was their time of the year. I told her that I was sorry I wasn’t there and tried to explain to her why I wasn’t. I told her about my RL health issues and constant tiredness because of it, then I went on to remind her that late September to Mid-October was a horrible time of the year for me because it is the anniversary of my RL best friend of over 22 years’ death and her birthday. So, during that time I’m a depressed mess. I constantly cry and like my health issues, I don’t want to bring people down, so I shell myself away from everyone. Her response to that was I was invalidating what she was going through, when all I was trying to explain was that I couldn’t be a rock for her when I was barely holding myself together. That wasn’t good enough for her. So, I let it go.

 

Then over the next weeks after this I was very upset because that sister was doing her best to cause a rift between me and my SL mom who is my best friend and who came to my RL wedding. So, I was understandably upset, so I went to the second “sister.”

 

The second “sister” came into the family as a great niece, then as a niece on a new Avi, then finally as a sister on another Avi. I saw no negatives with this sister. We were, so I thought, best friends, hung out all the time, and were even planning an RL trip together, but it turns out all that was a lie. In late October of 2022, I noticed her acting weird around me, she said everything was fine, then told me that she thought I had lied to her about losing Wi-Fi, when I in fact had, but she saw my Steam account still online, but instead of asking me how that was possible she just jumped to me was lying. You see I live in a house with my family and a roommate and with everyone being online or streaming having one internet/Wi-Fi connection was not cutting it, so the roommate and I got our one internet connection. There are times when my internet would go out and hers would stay connected and vice versa. So, when my Wi-Fi went out and she saw my Steam still logged if she would have asked me, I would have explained that my daughter was in her room, connected to the roommates Wi-Fi playing Phasmaphobia on my Steam account. She accepted my explanation, and we moved forward, or I thought we had.

 

In December of last year, this “sister’s” husband messaged the family on a server on Discord telling us that she had had a stroke and was in the hospital. My SL family was devastated and so worried about her, we were constantly asking for updates and asking if there was any way to help. We even did family pictures on SL for Christmas so they can be put into an electronic frame for her to have in her hospital room.  We also uploaded pictures and videos of her SL kids’ dance recitals, so she didn’t miss anything.

 

On SL I was a necklace with RLV so that people I’m close to can TP me when I go AFK or just to make going places easier. Well, the Monday before my surgery the list of who has that right showed up in local when I logged into SL, and I noticed her name was different, so I checked her profile, and she’s changed her name. In like September she told the family that her one little account was going to be given to her daughter and she would no longer be using, ok, I get that but now apparently her big account was being used by the same daughter and was still partnered to the account that was made for her husband. Made no sense but I accepted it.

 

I guess seeing that made my SL mom curious, so she started looking around only to find out that this sister had unfriended everyone from everywhere, SL, Discord, and Steam. When mom reached out to her “husband” he explained that she deleted everyone and no longer has a phone and is only in contact with him and their RL kids. Of course, she was understanding because of the stroke thing. Then things just started not to add up.

 

When I got back from the hospital after my surgery, I was informed that everyone thinks that this sister lied about having a stroke and her “husband” was just her trying to make everyone believe her. I logged on one day and saw that this “sister’s” RL daughter logged on after not logging on for a while, so I messaged her saying, “Omg haven’t seen this name in forever!” She and I had a general chit chat before I asked how she and her mom are both doing after the stroke. Her response proved to me that her mom had in fact lied about the whole thing. She said, “Name of her SL mom” I said no “her RL mom’s name” she said oh “RL name” is fine.  So, when I mentioned a stroke, she immediately thought I meant her SL mom who didn’t have one instead of her actual mom. Now this “sister” is looking for a family on her big and little account at an adoption place on SL. When her SL children reached out to her to express their hurt, she ignored them and left everyone in the family hurt.

 

Over the month or so since we have found out that she lied I have found out that she was talking bad about me for months. Sad thing is I would have gone to bat for this woman before all this. I believed she was really my friend/sister, and I was wrong, and it broke my heart. In the end though, we got the best of her, we got to continue to love the kids she left behind.

 

If moves on, and now our family is better and stronger than ever.